Need
by Wandering Dawn
Summary: Haymitch and Effie don't realise that they may just need each other to survive. She looked at him with emerald green eyes, bloodshot with a haunted look in them before staring down at her tiny hands that were twisting together in a nervous habit. "I – I'm not really sure why I'm here... I just... I didn't know where else to go." Hayfie
1. Chapter 1

Haymitch Abernathy was a complicated man. He was sarcastic for the most part, as well as a drunk but he also could be incredibly kind and paternal when he wanted to be. And that paternal instinct was precisely the reason why he had given up his drunken role, at least 90 percent of the time, for the last four months. Katniss Everdeen was one of the most battered and broken survivors of the war, as was Peeta Mellark. Being their old mentor, Haymitch felt as though he had an obligation to protect them and to comfort them in any way that he could in the past months. He had, after all, been assigned to be Katniss' escort home and guardian now that her mother was officially deemed too depressed to look after her and had fled to district 4.

On a particularly dreary autumn day after returning home from a visit to the Everdeen's house to make sure the young couple were doing well still he found himself sinking into the cushions on his sofa, his whole house now incredibly clean and odour free thanks to a new housekeeper he had hired, nursing a cup of mint tea and attempting to relax his sore muscles after a day of helping to rebuild the district. Again, this was not something he would usually take part in but he felt required to do so since he had effectively been the brains behind the rescue mission that had gotten district 12 bombed in the first place and with no alcohol to numb his guilt, he felt he had to do something.

A soft pitter patter of rain could be heard against the window of his home as he stared at the raindrops chasing each other down the glass, the occasional golden leaf blowing into it and sticking before being blown away again. He closed his eyes feeling exhaustion come over him and listened to the rain on the window for a few moments before a loud ringing went through the house due to the doorbell. Cursing the disturbance to his peace he got up and opened the door only to find someone he did not instantly recognise standing on his porch positively soaking wet. It seemed as though the young girl had been in the rain for quite some time.

She looked at him with emerald green eyes, bloodshot with a haunted look in them before staring down at her tiny hands that were twisting together in a nervous habit. "I – I'm not really sure why I'm here... I just... I didn't know where else to go," the girl said, her voice trembling in a high Capitol accent. Haymitch studied her for a moment. Her ash blonde hair pulled back into a ponytail and secured with a silk ribbon, her dark jeans and skyscraper midnight blue heels with matching t-shirt made of silk and the way in which her eyes were now staring at him in a pained expression. It all seemed so familiar to him. Yet, he was quite positive he had never seen this girl in his life.

The girl's face quickly turned into a pained expression at the obvious rejection on Haymitch's face, a blush instantly colouring her cheeks as she realised that he was not going to let her in. "I'm sorry, Haymitch, I shouldn't have come here... I don't know why I did... I'll just... go."

Haymitch's eyes widened in sudden realisation as he registered the voice that did not match the girl in front of him. "Effie?" he asked, feeling bewildered. Effie Trinket had certainly changed. She bit her lip, her blush darkening as she nodded her head slowly. He couldn't for the life of him comprehend that it was the same woman stood on his porch as the one he had left in the capitol all those months ago. "You look so..."

"I know... I didn't... Can't really be... Capitol right now... I'm sorry, Haymitch, I'm wasting your time... it was bad manners for me to show up without calling first, I just... I should go..."

Haymitch shook his head. She may not want to be Capitol material but she certainly still had the mannerisms of the old Effie Trinket. She hadn't changed completely. "Sweetheart, where are you going to go?" Effie looked down, not knowing the answer to that question before Haymitch sighed and stood aside for her to come into his house.

"Thankyou, Haymitch."

"Sit down on the sofa, I'll get you a blanket so you don't freeze to death or drip water on my sofa." Effie smiled, seeing the old Haymitch for the first time since she had knocked on his door. She clearly wasn't the only one who had been changed by the war.

She shuddered at the thought of the war. Horrible images flashed through her mind of her holding cell and she felt a painful twinge on her shoulder where she knew was a scar from her tortures. It felt like every inch of her body was live with electricity again, causing her to shudder and gasp as she tried to push the horrible feelings away. Pulling her knees up she wraps her arms around them tightly and buries her head into them, trying to push away the images, the nightmares.

"Effie!" she hears someone shout, but it sounds as though they're underwater, too far away for them to reach her in her own personal little hell hole. "EFFIE!" they call again, this time much closer. She squeezes her eyes shut before opening them again to see Haymitch stood there, a worried look on his face and a blanket in his hands. She also notices a new cup has made its way to the table in from of her. "Thought I'd lost you for a moment there, Princess," he growls. Effie just stares down at her knees, feeling shame overcome her. Haymitch sighs and wraps the blanket around her shoulders. "There is a shower upstairs on the left if you want to go clean yourself up. Get into some dry clothes before you catch a cold."

Again Effie blushes. "I don't really have any other clothes, Haymitch," she whispers, her voice breaking a little at the end.

Haymitch sighs running a hand tiredly over his face. "C'mon, Princess. Let's get you cleaned up. It's late, you can stay in the spare bedroom and we'll talk about why you're here when I'm not going to collapse from walking dead syndrome."

Effie smiles a bit and gets up, cup of tea in hand, and follows Haymitch up the stairs and into a pristine bedroom. She had to admit, she was impressed by the hospitality. She remembered the last time she had been here was to wake Haymitch for the reaping of the 74th hunger games and the smell and general uncleanliness was disgusting. He let her there for a moment before coming back with one of his shirts, boxers and a towel for her. "Put your clothes on the radiator when you're done in the shower, they'll be dry by the morning," he says before turning to leave the room.

"Thankyou, Haymitch," Effie says softly, never one to forget her manners. Haymitch just nods and leaves her alone, shutting the door to his own room behind him before falling on the bed and allowing his mind to race over what in the hell just happened.

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**AN; okay so i know this is rather... uncharacteristic and OOC of them but their canon characters will come out soon, promise. **

**As always, i love a review and i would appreciate feedback/what you liked about it if you alert/favorite it :D  
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	2. Chapter 2

A loud screaming is what jolted Haymitch awake that night. He could tell by the tone that it wasn't his own broken screams from his nightmares that had awoken him, and for the first time in a long time he couldn't hear screams from Peeta's house next door, meaning he had slept at Katniss' that night for the first time since they got home. Haymitch smiled slightly at that thought, they were finally moving along with their lives and finding their way again.

It wasn't until another high pitched, ear splitting scream rang out through the house that Haymitch remembered exactly why he was awake. It took him a few moments to remember that Effie Trinket was sleeping in his guest bedroom. Sighing he climbed out of bed as quickly as his sleep deprived state would let him and made his way across the hall. He thought about knocking before shaking his head, she was clearly still asleep since she was still screaming.

Opening the door he walked over to the bed and sat on the edge of it, noticing that she was currently trying to scratch at her arms in her sleep, her face filled with fear and her voice becoming raspy from the screaming she was still encountering. After taking a hold of both her shoulders, Haymitch shook her forcefully to try wake her up. "Effie!" he said softly but forcefully in order to get through her mind that it wasn't real. After a few more tries of shaking and shouting, his voice getting steadily louder as she become more unresponsive Effie finally awoke from her nightmare, trembling from head to foot, tear tracks quickly making their way down her cheeks. Though, it seemed, she still didn't understand what was going on.

"P-Please, d-don't hurt me a-again," she sobbed brokenly. Haymitch couldn't help but feel his heart break from the woman he once despised. As much as he hated the Capitol he didn't believe anyone should have nightmares the way he has done for the past 24 years.

"I'm not going to hurt you, Effie," he said softly, pulling her hands away from her arms as she continued in her habit of trying to scratch them. It was then he noticed that he fingernails were only half there, a sight that disturbed him somewhat. He ran the pad of his thumb over her half nail and looked at her in question. She just shook her head and continued in her sobbing, pulling her hands away from him and hiding them under the sheets twisted up around her waist. "It's not real, Effie. Whatever you were dreaming about, it's not real. You're safe here."

"I thought I was safe in the Capitol too," she whispered, almost inaudibly. Haymitch looked at her questioningly wondering what on earth had happened to the poor woman. He then remembered the episode yesterday where she had completely zoned out and curled in on herself.

"Princess, what happened to you?"

Effie just shook her head once again. "I c-can't, Haymitch."

A new round of sobbing broke through as Haymitch sighed and moved further back onto the bed before picking Effie up into his arms and placing her on his lap, his arms wrapping around the broken sobbing mess. He had done this so many times with Katniss he was used to the comforting gesture by now, even running a hand through her soft blonde curls in order to calm her down. Effie, however, was not used to such a gesture and froze in his arms. It wasn't until he starting whispering in her ear that he wasn't going to hurt her did she eventually relax and allow herself to be comforted by a man who once disgusted her. It was amazing how pain had brought the two together.

The two of them sat that way for hours, finding comfort in the other, until the sun rose and the light peeked through the curtains of Effie's window. "Cmon, Princess. Time for breakfast," Haymitch eventually said in his usual rough teasing tones, attempting to bring some normalcy back to the situation they had found themselves in. Effie smiled appreciatively.

"I'll just get dressed..."

"Nope, you'll come downstairs and help me. It would be rather bad manners to let your host cook and clean up all by himself wouldn't it?" Haymitch said with a teasing grin.

"_Actually,_" Effie said with a grin, "it would be rather bad manners of the host to ask such a thing of his guest."

"Good thing I don't care for manners then," he growled before pulling her from the bedroom before she could protest any more. Effie huffed at his manhandling and lack of manners but Haymitch ignored it, as he always hand and gave her a smirk instead, amusement dancing in his steel grey Seam eyes.

Upon entering the kitchen Haymitch immediately put some tea on to boil on the stove whilst instructing Effie to put some grains and goat milk onto the boil too. She did so without complaint as Haymitch then began cutting up various fruits. Once everything was ready and dished up the two sat at the table to eat.

"So are you going to tell me why you came here?" he asked suddenly. Effie looked down at her plate in silence. "You're going to have to talk about it sometime," he added gently.

"I don't know, Haymitch, I don't really have any friends outside of the Capitol and I couldn't stay there anymore..." Her eyes got a far off look in the again causing Haymitch to snap his fingers in front of her face.

"Stay with me, Princess. Why didn't you want to stay in the Capitol?"

Effie stared at Haymitch in a calculating way for a moment. She knew that he was usually drunk because of the games and the horrors in which he wanted to forget about the arena she also knew he had taken a large hand in the rebellion. He was not a stranger to death, destruction or torture. After all, she had heard him late at night in the Capitol when she first became an escort that he had nightmares too. That was when he drank the most, just before bed, in hopes that he wouldn't have nightmares. Sometimes it worked, she thinks. Taking a deep breath Effie looked down at the tables, twisting her hands together in her nervous habit again.

"There were too many... memories there. Bad memories."

"Like what, Sweetheart?" Effie noticed the tone of his voice had changed. The nickname, for the first time since she met him, was not a term of condescension but of endearment and his voice had lost the teasing, gruff tone he had used earlier. He sounded like he actually cared. Once glance at him face showed he was genuinely interested.

"Do you remember, during the Quarter Quell when Peeta and Johanna and the girl from district 4 were taken prisoner?" Haymitch nodded slowly, having a bad feeling about what she was going to tell him. "They took me too, Haymitch. Only your soldiers didn't rescue me..." instantly Haymitch felt the pressure of guilt wrap around his heart as he took in the woman sat in front of him. Suddenly it all made sense. Her crying, the zoning out, the nightmares, the screaming, the stiffness towards him when he tried to comfort her. She had been driven to the brink of insanity, much like Annie Cresta had during her games. "I was there until the end of the war... The doctor said I was lucky to be alive..."

"Effie... I'm so sorry, if I had known... I assumed they would leave you alone since you were a Capitol citizen... you hadn't even done anything wrong." Haymitch couldn't stop the guilt crushing him further, weighing him down. "I should have known since you were so close to us..."

Effie shook her head. "Haymitch, please, don't. It's over and I'm here... I have to be thankful that they didn't take much else from me. I could have been turned into an Avox or they could have cut off limbs. I have to be thankful that they didn't go that far, although usually they would have... I think by the end of it, they knew I didn't have any information, they just enjoyed seeing me in pain..." She took a deep breath before continuing, trying to stop her voice from breaking. "I just can't stay there after what they did to me."

Haymitch nodded understanding now. "It's okay, Effie. You don't have to tell me anything until you're ready." She nodded before standing up and leaving the table, not wanting Haymitch to see her cry for the second time that day.

**AN: **

**So much love on the faves/alerts front but barely any reviews D:  
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**please tell me what you liked/didn't like :)  
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**sorry for any tense confusion, i'm rather bad at sticking to one tense haha - im working on it though, promise :)  
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	3. Chapter 3

Over the next few days Haymitch and Effie had fallen into a routine of sorts. Every night they would go to bed in separate rooms only for Haymitch to end up in Effie's room for the night, cradling her in his arms as she worked through her consciousness to distinguish reality from dreams. Haymitch would then drag her out of bed in the morning with the insistence that she eat and they both have breakfast and clean up together. He had not brought up her confession from the first morning and neither had she, feeling as though she could not yet talk about it due to the fact that she broke down every time she even began to think about what the Capitol did to her. after breakfast the two parted ways; Haymitch to go check upon Katniss and Peeta, and Effie to the confines of her room where she usually found herself sat upon the bed, gripped with daymares and flashbacks until Haymitch came home and pulled her from it once again.

She really did owe him everything considering how patient he had been with her, she mused one morning as she robotically washed the extra dishes that had been left when Haymitch had been called by Sae on an emergency visit to the Everdeen household. Effie stood facing the window, watching as the rain fell again. She had noticed that it tends to rain a lot here during these months whereas it was constantly sunny in the Capitol, not a speck of moisture to be found. It was almost refreshing for her to see the rain. She had read somewhere, probably in one of the stupidly predictable romance novels from the Capitol, that rain connotes sadness. For Effie, she didn't feel sadness. She felt hopeful for the first time since she had been found in her underground prison.

Haymitch had told her that she could stay as long as she needed to stay. That small notion of friendship and the comfort her brought her every night and most days had given her a small spark of hope that things would get better. He had told her himself that it gets easier, that the nightmares become less frequent and more manageable. He had told her to carry on hoping because he knew that she was strong, despite the fact that she hadn't believed it herself when she was begging for death. But for some unknown reason, she believed him. She trusted him that things would get better, even if he was just telling her these things to get her to stop sobbing uncontrollably. Something told Effie that this was not the case, though. He genuinely did seem to care.

Smiling softly at the thought of someone caring about her Effie placed the last dish on the draining board and pulled the plug from the sink, allowing the last of the bubbles to fall from her fingers and finally dried her hands on the dishcloth. Finding herself missing the warm soapy feeling on her skin she decided to go draw herself a bath with the bubble bath that, surprisingly, was in Haymitch's medicine cabinet. Sinking in to the warm water Effie sighed in happiness. It was rare these days that she took a bath as she had taken a long time for her to get used to the feeling of water without feeling electricity coursing through her veins a moment later, but she knew she was safe at Haymitch's house. She just had to keep reminding herself of where she was. Finally she relaxed into the water, allowing the tension to leave her body and a smile to grace her usually sad features and let her eyes drift closed.

Hours later found Effie stood in front of the mirror in her room clad in nothing but her underwear. She scrutinized her body with distaste seeing all the scars littering her skin. She knows she should be grateful to be alive but a small part of her wishes they had finished her off so that she wouldn't have to live in fear or in the body that was a constant reminder of all that she had lost. Taking her lipstick from her bag she walked closer to the mirror and began ringing all the parts of her body that were the most scarred on her reflection. Starting at her face she drew circles on her forehead where there were scars usually covered by makeup. She then moved to her collarbone where there was a scar running down her chest to her rib on the opposite side of her body. Making her way down the mirror she soon found herself sitting on the floor sobbing.

Haymitch found her there not soon after. He stood in the doorway for a moment taking in the sight in front of him. The lipstick on the mirror, Effie sting there in little more than her underwear, the sobbing broken mess of a woman. He quickly manoeuvred himself to the wardrobe, picked up one of his old shirts and walked over to her, wrapping her up in the checked blue shirt and sitting down beside her with her gathered up in his arms. He rocked her back and forth slowly rubbing small circles in her back and whispering comforting words into her ear to calm her down. "Shhh. Shh. Efiie it's okay... it's okay. You're going to be okay."

Effie hiccupped slightly before staring at the mirror for a moment before burying her head in his shoulder once again. It was then Haymitch noticed the word she had written at the bottom of the circles and scribbles. _Imperfections. _His heart broke a little as he realised what she had done.

Cupping her face in his hand he pulled it up towards his own to study her face. He could see the shame and broken down expression. Effie had always been one to depend on her looks and now she thought she was destroyed because of what they did to her. he lifted her u and stood her in front of the mirror, taking the shirt from around her shoulders leaving her exposed. He noticed the scar running down her back horizontally from shoulder to hip and he traced it softly with his index finger. He felt Effie shudder and begin to pull away from him but he simply wrapped an arm around her waist anchoring her there with him.

"Is this honestly what you think?" he asked gesturing to the mirror. Again she looked down in shame and attempted to cover herself with her too thin arms. He hadn't noticed how thin she looked before now. He lifted her chin again to look in the mirror at him and he laid his chin on her shoulder, bending down to do so. He traced another scar across her stomach, then the one from her ribs to her shoulder and finally following one down her forearm. Effie trembled as she watched him in the mirror feeling exposed and on the verge of another breakdown. It had been so long since someone was this tender with her body. "Every single scar is a piece of you, Effie Trinket. Every single one tells a story of hope, bravery, courage and survival. Each one is there to remind you of how strong you are and how much you have overcome to be here today. They are NOT imperfections. They are truly giving to your beauty."

Effie promptly burst into tears upon hearing this affirmation of everything she was self conscious about. She knew he was right of course. She was still here, still alive, still mostly sane which is more than she could say for most after the war. "I'm far from beautiful, Haymitch," she sobbed softly, turning to bury her face in his shoulder.

"I disagree," he said before lifting her face up to face his once again. "When you turned up on my doorstep over a week ago, I didn't even recognise you, Effie. You looked so different and yet, I've never seen you look as beautiful as you had in that moment, stood on my doorstep looking like you had walked from district two or three or four in the pouring rain. I couldn't have guessed who you really were until you spoke. You have changed, yes. But I believe that it is for the better. Your natural beauty is something so much more than you ever had in the Capitol get up."

It was then that Effie did something neither of them had ever expected.

She kissed him.

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**AN: thankyou so much to everyone who has stuck with this story and i'm so sorry about the length of update time, i've been so busy and this chapter was especially hard for me to write and it addresses some deep issues within my own mind. I hope you all enjoyed it :) reviews are appreciated! **


	4. Chapter 4

**I am super duper duper sorry this took me so long to get out (and that it's so short!) I've been so busy lately moving house, going back home, finding a job etc etc. I promise i'll try harder to get chapters out! I promise i have NOT abandoned this story!**

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Haymitch pulled back slowly not knowing what to make of the situation they had found themselves in. Was he happy she had kissed him? He didn't know. Was he going to allow himself to take advantage of her? Certainly not. Was he going to allow her the comfort she clearly needed from the physical touch? Perhaps just a hug? He knew he couldn't just pretend as though it didn't happen but he didn't want Effie to regret what she was about to do even more.

"Effie..."

Effie shook her head and placed a finger to his lips. "Please, Haymitch, don't say anything. I know it was stupid... I – I just thought that... never mind." She wrapped the shirt tightly around her body before turning and leaving to go sit downstairs alone. Haymitch watched her go with a confused expression adorning his face.

He walked to his own room and sat down on his bed with his head in his hands. Why was it so difficult to believe that this wasn't an inevitability anyway? He found her extremely attractive the day she had turned up on his doorstep as herself, not the Capitol bred _thing _he had previously thought she was. There clearly had to be feelings on her part to even think of turning to him in her time of need, it wasn't as if he had been hospitable towards her at all during their time together over the years. But maybe, just maybe she had grown fond of him and his so called insults over the years?

Or maybe she just literally had nowhere else to go.

Although she could have chosen Peeta, Katniss, Plutarch, Portia... or anyone for that matter to help her though her time. But she chose him. Why did she choose him?

Did he return her feelings? He wasn't sure. Were there even any feelings?

Haymitch groaned putting his head in his hands once again, digging his palm deep into his eyes in frustration. He was so confused and frustrated and it was clear he wasn't going to work any of this out on his own. Instead he decided to pretend, at least for now, that it hadn't happened. It had been a long day with Peeta and Katniss and it was time he took a nap... or maybe put his head down for the night. Effie could make herself something to eat, she knew where everything was. He wasn't all that hungry. Perhaps a nap would be good?

Laying his head down and closing his eyes his last thought was how soft Effie's lips felt against his own just for those few seconds.

[x]

As every night Haymitch awoke to the high pitched screaming and sobbing that came from Effie during her nightmares. Sighing he got up and made his way to her room, frowning upon entering as the bed was still made from that morning. As the screaming stopped he realised she must still be downstairs. Walking slowly down the stairs towards his front room he saw Effie curled up on the couch, the shirt he had given her hanging loosely around her too thin frame had risen up to expose her pink lacy underwear she had worn for the day. Her arms were wrapped around her torso as if to give some comfort to herself and her face was lined with tear tracks from her recent nightmare.

Haymitch never though she looked more beautiful than when she was truly broken.

He felt sickened at the way his brain thought of that but it was true. The raw emotion so stripped back to the bone, so far from her perfectly put together Capitol mask was truly beautiful to him. If that made him a sadist then so be it. Effie Trinket was truly beautiful and he felt sorry for every single person who didn't see it.

Walking over to her he pulled her up into a sitting position and crouched down in front of her, cupping her cheek in his left hand, using his right to prise her arms away from her chest and hold her right hand at the wrist. "It's okay, Effie. It's over. You're not there, you're here. Whatever it is you're still seeing, it's not real."

Effie nodded staring at her wrist where his hand currently was. She attempted to pull it away but her only grabber her hand instead. "No. No more running away." Effie nodded slowly looking into his eyes for the first time. "I'm going to take you to see Peeta tomorrow. I think it's time you two found some strength from each other. You both need it." Again Effie nodded, still staring at his face. Haymitch was beginning to feel uncomfortable so he slowly stood up and offered her his other hand." She took it, holding on with both hands and allowed him to pull her to her feet. He then led her back upstairs and to his bedroom.

Effie stared at him in confusion. "I need my own bed tonight but I also need seep, sweetheart." Effie blushed a deep red knowing she had woken him up yet again. She felt incredibly guilty but at the same time she knew she couldn't help it. Maybe she should go back to her apartment at the Capitol. Surely she had overstayed her welcome by now? Smiling, Haymitch pulled her closer towards him and wrapped an arm around her body. "I don't know what it is about you, Trinket, but you always make me want to act the hero." He then dipped his head slightly and pressed his lips to hers. "Now, c'mon. Bed."

Blushing head to foot Effie followed him into his room and laid on his bed with his arm wrapped securely around her torso. She felt a smile creep onto her face as he slept. He didn't hate her for kissing him. He didn't mind if she stayed. That's all she needed in that particular moment. Reassurance. As his arm tightened around her as he slept and his head made it's way to the crook of her neck Effie allowed herself to wonder for the first time since she had kissed him if perhaps he could indeed have more than platonic feelings for her. Him kissing her again certainly suggested it, and everything he had said to her earlier also suggested it. Did she dare allow herself to hope?


	5. Chapter 5

The next day saw Effie and Peeta in the sitting room of Katniss' house and talking quietly to one another over a cup of tea. Haymitch and Katniss sat in the kitchen observing the two with their own cups of tea. "This will be good for the both of them, you know?" Katniss said quietly. "Peeta's been struggling a lot again lately and I think it may help him to remember he isn't alone in what happened at the Capitol. There is only so much I can do for him, y'know?"

Haymitch nodded silently observing the way in which Effie's walls slowly began to break away as she was conversing with Peeta. He could see her limbs start to shake and her lip begin to quiver right before Peeta pulled her in tightly for a hug. He could tell she was on the verge of crying once more. Peeta himself looked as though he was battling some demons right then and there with her. "I know sweetheart, she is to him what I am to you. Understanding." Katniss nodded her head in agreement. Haymitch hit the nail right on the head. Haymitch knew how it felt to lose everyone, to be in the hunger games, to be in a war. Peeta, of course, knew this too, but not on the same level as Haymitch did. The Capitol's torture saw to that. His memories still being hazy he didn't remember the same kind of pain in which Katniss did. Instead, he felt the pain of torture and skewed memories. Something Effie could indeed help him with.

Haymitch could feel Katniss' eye upon him and slowly took his eyes from Effie to her. She had that knowing look in her eyes that Haymitch wasn't all that fond of at times. That was the trouble with having someone who understood you and was like you in almost every way. They could see right through you. "You should tell her."

"Tell her what?"

"How you feel." Katniss rolled her eyes and sighed exasperatedly. "It's clear you care for her Haymitch. Let yourself be happy for once. Let her in." Haymitch looked away at her words. He knew that something had changed yesterday between them, he knew that his feelings had changed, but he didn't know what to think at that moment or how to go about figuring that out.

"I need to get my head straight first, sweetheart."

"Just don't wait too long. It hurts to lose them." Haymitch placed his hand over hers and squeezed it softly in order to bring her back from her memories of 13 and Peeta's capture. Katniss smiled ruefully at his gesture before opening her mouth again with words that shocked Haymitch so much that he felt like a deer caught in headlights. "Peeta asked me to marry him."

"W-What? He's only been here a couple of months!" Haymitch felt his fatherly protection towards Katniss kick in, he was very worried about the couple. Surely this was too fast?

"I know, but why wait when you know you love each other? Don't worry, I only agreed on the terms that it would be a long engagement," she said with a small smile that seemed to light up her face.

Haymitch sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose allowing the information to sink in. "So long as you're happy... just be careful Katniss, he still has a lot of healing to do. And so do you for that matter."

"I know."

"Haymitch?" a small voice came from behind him causing him to jump a little at the sound of Effie's voice. He turned around to see her standing behind him, tear tracks still adorning her face but a small smile residing there none the less. "Can we go home? I want to talk to you." Haymitch nodded taking her hand in his. After bidding Peeta and Katniss goodbye he took Effie home resolving to speak to Peeta about his engagement tomorrow.

Upon stepping through the door he could immediately feel Effie tense up a little. He looked to the side towards her with a questioning glance but she shrugged it off and sat down upon the couch with her legs folded under her and he head down, staring at the floor. Once again, she was shuddering slightly. Haymitch frowned sitting beside her and placed a hand upon hers once again to show his comfort and support. Effie took a deep breath before turning her head to look him in the eyes.

"Haymitch, I- I want to tell you exactly what happened to me in the Capitol," Effie whispered quietly, allowing herself to tremble again slightly.

Haymitch shook his head. "Did Peeta tell you to?" Effie nodded feeling tear tracks rolls down her face. Haymitch sighed. "Effie, you're not ready, I can see you're not ready and I don't want to push you to tell me. We're doing well right now, and I am okay with not knowing right this minute. I know that he told you to tell me in order for you to move on, but you won't be able to if you're not ready. Okay?" Effie nodded slowly feeling her body sag with relief.

Haymitch wrapped his arms around her and pulled her towards him on the sofa until she was resting against his chest. He slowly ran his fingers through her blonde hair and kissed the top of her head. Effie relaxed into his touch for a moment before turning and kissing him softly. Haymitch returned her kiss, unlike the previous night in which he had been too stunned to do anything. This time, he realised that he wanted to kiss Effie. Actually, he wanted more than to kiss her, but until he found out exactly what happened to her in the Capitol he wasn't going to push her to do anything. Who knows what horrible memories he would bring to the surface?

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**Okay so I realise that it's short and i'm super sorry about that, but that just felt like a good place to end it. Also i'm sorry if Katniss was rather OOC. **

**Thirdly, the next chapter will regrettably be that last, i just think that it would be a good place to end it because This kind of trauma isn't something you get over quickly and I just think that ending it at the place where she finds herself healing with Haymitch is more realistic for this story than dragging it out and boring you all. I want to thank everyone who reviewed the last chapter and hope that you guys will do the same again for this one :)  
**

**Check out my other HG story; Safe and Sound? please and thankyou!  
**


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: Okay so first of all i'm SO SO SO SO SO SORRY that it took me this long to update. I'm a bad writer, but this is the last chapter, I hope you've enjoyed this story and I want to thank everyone for the support you've given me through this story, it was truly appreciated :) I love each and every one of you!  
**

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It took Effie a whole two months to be able to feel completely safe around Haymitch. It took another month for her to seriously contemplate what Peeta had told her about telling Haymitch what had happened to her in the Capitol. What she didn't expect was for herself to bring it up one night after crawling into Haymitch's bed after yet another nightmare.

"You know, Sweetheart, you should just skip the waking up in the middle of the night to come in here and just stay in here to begin with. The screams are really startin' to become a problem," Haymitch said with a smile as he wrapped his arms around her as he had started to automatically do lately. Effie buried her face into his shoulder before starting to sob violently. Frowning Haymitch tightened his arms around her. She hadn't sobbed so violently after a nightmare since she first moved in, it had to have been a particularly bad one. "Eff?" he asked tentatively, stroking through her hair. "Sweetheart, what happened?"

Effie shook her head sadly. She didn't want to talk about the nightmare. She had other things she had to say. "Haymitch, I don't want to have these nightmares anymore. I want them to go away!"

Haymitch sighed softly kissing the top of her head. "They'll never go away Effie, but they will fade in time. They'll get easier."

"They never come when you're with me. I don't drift away, I don't have nightmares, I don't have crushing emotions bubbling up inside me, pulling me back under. You help them, Haymitch. You make them easier." She took a deep breath moving so that she was staring up into his eyes. "I want to tell you what happened, Haymitch. I want you to know and understand what happens when my mind wanders back to those moments."

Haymitch nodded slowly, seeing the determination in her eyes. He knew she needed to do this. Taking her hand in his for support he sat up and leaned against the pillows, urging her to do the same thing. She did so squeezing his hand tightly, tears already running down her face. "Just start at the beginning."

Taking a deep breath Effie began her eyes moving down to their clasped hands. "They found me in the crowd watching the games on the big screen in the Capitol. I followed the peacekeeper because he said President Snow needed to see me. I trusted them. I didn't know what was going on, I just knew that the feed had been cut off. I thought he was going to tell me what was going on as I was the district twelve escort. I – I thought that I was safe." She took a deep breath, feeling the tears come thick and fast as her voice broke on the last word.

Haymitch reached around her shoulders, pulling her closer to him. "You're safe now, Eff. I promise, you're safe."

"The first thing he did was ask me what was going on," she continued as if she hadn't heard him. Haymitch resigned himself to thinking that she probably hadn't, withdrawing into her own mind as she told him what happened, her voice becoming more hollow and detached with every word. "When I told him he didn't know he began to get more aggressive, threatening me, telling me if I liked my tongue I should talk. When I still couldn't tell him anything he put me in the prison... a few hours later I heard Peeta, Johanna and Enobaria join us. Annie came a few more hours later. They'd take us out one by one, asking us what we knew. If we didn't talk we are beat and tortured. I don't remember much from some of them, just pain. So much pain. I'd go inside my head, try to think of something else. You'd usually come to mind. I think I called out for you to help sometimes. I don't really remember, that's just what Peeta had told me, the few times they tortured us in our cells. I remember the electricity and water and how they'd take some sick enjoyment from breaking bones or running blades across our skin slowly just deep enough to cause serious pain, making us bleed for hours.

When the others escaped they began to get rougher and rougher with me, trying to get me to tell them things I didn't know. They got angry and they took it out on the one person left behind. I – I can't stop thinking about how, on the last day I was there, just before they found me they... they..." she broke off sobbing loudly, unable to control her voice or her emotions any longer.

Haymitch turned her head around to face him, knowing that this was important. "What did they do, Eff?"

"They strapped me down to do the surgery. They were going to cut out my tongue... and they - they were inappropriate, Haymitch. I was found before they got very far. The rebels took over quickly and took out the doctors and peacekeepers. I was so scared, Haymitch."

Haymitch gathered his quickly rising emotions as he gathered Effie into his arms holding her to his chest tightly. He kissed the top of her head and rocked her back and forth. "You don't need to be scared anymore, you're here, you're safe and you're loved."

Effie froze in his arms and pulled away from him quickly. She stared at his face searchingly for a moment, stunned at what he had said. "L-Loved?" he asked weakly.

He ran a hand over his face as he realized what had slipped from his mouth. "I did not want to tell you like that. At all. But yes, Effie. I love you."

"But, why?"

"I told you, Trinket. You make me wanna play the hero. These past few months, I've fallen for the broken girl and I want to piece her back together."

Effie smiled softly. "You already are."

She leaned in and kissed him feeling a weight leave her shoulders. Now that Haymitch knew, and still wanted to keep her around she felt like she could really move on with Haymitch in her life. He would help her. She was still broken and battered but she felt for the first time since she had been captured that she could finally put the pieces back together. It would take a long time, but she could do it. Especially with a man she knew she could love with everything she had left.


End file.
